Life just has a funny way of being...confusing, ever-changing, and sometimes punishing.
My back has been healing quite well. I have been working out for three weeks now. I really...desperately...urgently need to lose the weight I have put on since my injury almost 21 weeks ago. My mood and personality just isn't the same when my confidence is this low. I try to put on a happy face, but really, I feel like a shadow of myself--a larger shadow that shades more ground than I'd like.
They say that men prefer larger, confident women than a supermodel with a horrible personality. I don't want to be a supermodel (fitness model, yes!). I don't want to be 'thinner' and leaner for anybody but myself. It really sucks when your own clothes don't fit you...when you can't find clothes that DO fit you...and when you can't pull off clothes because of your belly (or larger boobs!). Yes boobs suck. They can go down a cup size and I'd be happy.
So for my new workouts, I have been doing cardio. Namely the stairclimber and elliptical. Also, since I can't lift very heavy weights because of my back, I am instead lifting about 70-75% of my max, but doing many reps, about 20. I do 4 sets of these. It's much easier on my back than attempting to lift heavier weights and be in pain. We'll see how it goes though. I realllyyy need to get my diet on track. That really is the hardest part for me. I love working out and would spend the whole day in the gym if I could. But the diet part of fitness?! Well, I just always have a sweet tooth that gets the better of me. I'm struggling to find the balance I need. It will come though. I just have to have more self discipline.
For now everybody, goodbye and have a blessed day. If anybody is reading this on the East coast, be safe in this hurricane!
